April 27, 2021

I like to think of ideas as potential energy. They’re really wonderful, but nothing will happen until we risk putting them into action.

 

Mae Jemison

April 1, 2021

It’s a wonderful thing to be optimistic. It keeps you healthy and it keeps you resilient.

 

Daniel Kahneman

March 22, 2021

Expect problems and eat them for breakfast.

 

Alfred A. Montapert

 

 

 

WHY IS IT SO HARD TO CHANGE?

As the year 2021 rolls out, I’ve been thinking about change. After last year, I imagine I’m not the only one.

I wondered why was 2020 such a difficult year for me. I have so many things for which to be thankful. My cup runneth over with blessings. I had plenty of space in my house to move around. When I grew tired of looking at the backyard, I could switch to another room and gaze at the front yard, then later in the day I could view the side yard and the playground across the street. I had food to eat, of which I’m sure I gobbled up too much. Now, I have a newfound fondness for salty snacks. My hobbies are enough to keep me busy for hours. But since I wasn’t living my life on my terms, the way I know and love, I started feeling isolated and withdrawn.


I asked myself, what did I have to be melancholy about? Was I just feeling sorry for myself? Was I being a whiny adult who wanted things my way? No matter how I answered those questions, what I felt was real, and I struggled with the change.

I’ve contemplated the many events of last year and there are a few things I have identified that contributed to my swings in emotions. There are things I have to accept. I had no control over what’s happening in the world. I’m not sure I’ve totally accepted that realization yet. Who doesn’t want to think they have power and authority over their life? When I was young, I couldn’t wait to grow up and do all the wonderful things I envisioned adults did. I would decide what vegetables I wouldn’t eat, or the right bedtime for me, or when I’d clean my room or what time I need to leave the club, or how much to spend on a new pair of shoes. Yes, that’s what growing up was all about for me. And now, I couldn’t even go to the mall and buy a pair of shoes or order another glass of wine in a restaurant as I pushed the vegetables to the side of my plate.

In 2020, I lost something I valued…spontaneity. My extroverted self loves spontaneity. It’s built into my DNA. If there was somewhere to go, I packed my bags without asking questions, and I had my plane ticket in hand. Now there is nowhere to go. There is no excitement in going to the grocery store—which has been the only routine place I now visit. I value my relationships and now I’m stuck inside, not fully able to interact with family and friends the way I have my entire life.
These changes weren’t gradual enough to give me time to adjust. I didn’t get a chance to adapt a little overtime. One day I could, the next day I couldn’t. I couldn’t raise my hand for a time-out or ask for a do-over. I wish I could. Oh yeah, any kind of change is hard.

Change Just Ahead Green Road Sign with Dramatic Clouds, Sun Rays and Sky.

So, as I face 2021, I’m taking a deep breath. I know some days, I’m going to be extra wary and some days all this change won’t bother me as much. But no matter what I’m feeling, those feelings are mine, and those feelings are real.

March 3, 2021

Humans aren’t as good as we should be in our capacity to empathize with feelings and thoughts of others, be they humans or other animals on Earth. So maybe part of our formal education should be training in empathy. Imagine how different the world would be if, in fact, that were ‘reading, writing, arithmetic, empathy.’

 

Neil deGrasse Tyson

February 10, 2021

If we don’t change, we don’t grow. If we don’t grow, we aren’t really living.

 

Gail Sheehy

 

 

 

January 19, 2021

Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do.

Pele

LET’S GET HAPPY AND THANKFUL

In my last blog post, I talked about all the things I wish I had done differently in 2019 in preparation for 2020. This time around, I will humble myself for the joy that 2020 brought me.

Nothing is ever all bad or all good. 2020 was the year of challenges, but it also brought some laughs and joy.

 

First, and closest to my heart—my mother, who proudly claims the title of a senior citizen is well and healthy. I see her smile and hear her laugh, and that alone makes my heart sing. But wait, there’s more.

Even with the pandemic imposed visit restrictions, I spent more time with my sister and mother. Quality time, where we laughed, talked, ate good food, and told stories. Sometimes, calling twice a day to share something we’d forgotten. They live in a different state, so this was no small accomplishment that I was blessed to have. Thanks to Zoom, I’ve seen more family this year than most. Get-togethers on Zoom also allowed me to visit my sister-writers, board members, and teams.

My husband and I have been in the house together for ten full months. Except for a trip to the grocery store or the hardware store or an odd visit with loved ones, it’s been the two of us—day and night. And as far as I can tell, he hasn’t wanted to strangle me, nor I, him. We’ve binged watched movies and series and shared memories. But most of all we’ve laughed together. We’ve found a closeness that has only deepened our marriage and added a new layer of warmth.

Coronavirus is surging again, so we’ve gone back into lockdown, but I’m talking to my family more, and these conversations warm my soul. Even my children—who are busy with their own daily lives, check in with me more often.

Being stuck inside made me happy and thankful I have space where I can relax, and read and write and eat cookies, and watch movies, and eat cookies and listen to music and eat cookies.

Yes, I’ve eaten my share of cookies. 2020 has been a rough year, full of bad news. But there were some glimmers of light. The country elected its first female vice president. Kamala Harris is a woman of color and a member of Alpha Kappa Alpha, Sorority, Inc., the first African American Sorority in the country and my sorority. We also now have two Coronavirus vaccines that might save the world from the ravages of the pandemic and let us return to some kind of normalcy.

Yes, 2020 was rough. I just had to look for some good in the year.

Happy New Year! Let’s Hope 2021 is Better.

December 20, 2020

The theme of ‘A Christmas Story’ is that you can count on Christmas – that everybody has a Christmas story. Everybody has that time in the holiday season that they remember.

Marc Platt

Decemer 7, 2020

You are the sum total of everything you’ve ever seen, heard, eaten, smelled, been told, forgot – it’s all there. Everything influences each of us, and because of that I try to make sure that my experiences are positive.

Maya Angelou